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Author Topic: Sondra's Mailbox  (Read 17656 times)

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Hello Goodbye

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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #140 on: August 30, 2009, 07:41:13 AM »

My father's brother and sister are doctors too as are my cousins on that side with the exception of one who's an RN and my sister who's an attorney.

Hey!  Maybe my dad's side of the family reaally is crazy!  :)
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Sondra

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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #141 on: August 30, 2009, 07:41:40 AM »

Maybe it's more enlightened than educated. I know I'm painting my family out to be horrible, but really, they're okay. I've got my issues too that's for sure. I've just always felt I didn't belong in that family. But I'm sure a lot of people feel this way.
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Sondra

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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #142 on: August 30, 2009, 07:43:17 AM »

My father's brother and sister are doctors too as are my cousins on that side with the exception of one who's an RN and my sister who's an attorney.

Hey!  Maybe my dad's side of the family reaally is crazy!  :)

Maybe the attorney, but the rest are okay/ ;)
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #143 on: August 30, 2009, 07:43:44 AM »

I know you feel they're OK, Sondra.  What I'm trying to say is that all of what you're experiencing is not unique.
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Sondra

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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #144 on: August 30, 2009, 07:44:49 AM »

I can't type very well.  I hope my responses are not too non sequitur.

No, I just don't want to assume anything. Hence the constant need for clarification. I'm not too bright over here.
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #145 on: August 30, 2009, 07:47:03 AM »

Maybe the attorney, but the rest are okay/ ;)
Well, you know how we feel about attorneys!  My sister is the outgoing, argumentative type.  She fits the profession well.  I'm very much different than her.
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #146 on: August 30, 2009, 07:48:53 AM »

I'm not too bright over here.
I know you're joking.  If you're not, I'd argue that point with you.
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Sondra

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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #147 on: August 30, 2009, 07:50:25 AM »

I know you feel they're OK, Sondra.  What I'm trying to say is that all of what you're experiencing is not unique.

Of course not. And there are way too many people who have it way worse for me to even have the nerve to complain. Human behavior and the family dynamic is fascinating. And I find the more I discuss it or work it out, the better I understand it. I really don't mean to sound like I'm complaining!
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #148 on: August 30, 2009, 07:52:34 AM »

Well, you know how we feel about attorneys!  My sister is the outgoing, argumentative type.  She fits the profession well.  I'm very much different than her.

Now if she was a public defender, that would be workable. :D
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #149 on: August 30, 2009, 07:58:48 AM »

Human behavior and the family dynamic is fascinating. And I find the more I discuss it or work it out, the better I understand it. I really don't mean to sound like I'm complaining!

I know you're not complaining, Sondra.  I've always been amused at your occasional comments.  It often sounds very familiar.

And it's good to verbalize, especially when it initiates a discussion.  This particular discussion has been most significant, I feel.  And it started by me arguing what you said about how you felt those jeans made you appear.  ;)
« Last Edit: August 30, 2009, 08:01:16 AM by Hello Goodbye »
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #150 on: August 30, 2009, 08:00:17 AM »

Now if she was a public defender, that would be workable. :D
No.  She specializes in corporate law.
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #151 on: August 30, 2009, 08:09:31 AM »

Sondra,  it's 3 hours later out here.  This was a nice way to spend my time on call to the ER this evening.  I wasn't interrupted by this pager and I was able to carry on a nice conversation.  At this hour, it's unlikely that I'll get called.  So I'll wish you a good night.  Sundays, rounds with the residents are late.

Now remember, you looked very nice in that outfit.  Very nice!
« Last Edit: August 30, 2009, 08:12:50 AM by Hello Goodbye »
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #152 on: August 30, 2009, 08:14:52 AM »

I know you're not complaining, Sondra.  I've always been amused at your occasional comments.  It often sounds very familiar.

And it's good to verbalize, especially when it initiates a discussion.  This particular discussion has been most significant, I feel.  And it started by me arguing what you said about how you felt those jeans made you appear.  ;)

I know I have to be on my toes when debating you cuz nothing gets by you. You're a bit too sharp! I can't get by with my usual long winded BS that sometimes passes as an actual valid point. I think I learned that in school. Drone on long enough and people think you know something.
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #153 on: August 30, 2009, 08:15:44 AM »

Night!
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #154 on: August 30, 2009, 11:41:43 PM »

Night!
And good afternoon to you now.


I know I have to be on my toes when debating you cuz nothing gets by you. You're a bit too sharp! I can't get by with my usual long winded BS that sometimes passes as an actual valid point. I think I learned that in school. Drone on long enough and people think you know something.
Well, many people can indeed be fooled by a long-winded dissertation but in reality a terse, concise statement can really drive the point home.  I'm sometimes criticized for being too succinct when it comes to my teaching technique in the residency training program I'm in.  But that's an appropriate trait to have in the surgical specialties.  One has to be quick and deliberate performing the procedure and there's little time for extended explanation.  The lengthy, cerebral technique is appropriate in the medical specialties.

Your quick and pointed remarks in this Forum have always impressed me.  When you go off on the "long-winded" posts, I know your BS-ing.  :)

Now, I was thinking about last night's (or this morning's) conversation and I remembered a funny incident which, perhaps, might sum up the points I was trying to make.  My sister was being a bit to severe with her youngest son who was nine at the time.  It had to do with homework and studying for a test.  My nephew is brilliant and gets his work and studying done quickly.  I had just quized him and he knew his stuff and I so reported to her.  None-the-less, she sternly told him to keep studying.  He turned to her, put his hands on his hips and said:  "What are you so angry about?"  My sister threw her arms up and walked off, defeated.  My nephew turned to me and said:  "That's her personality!"  Pretty sharp for a nine year old, huh?  If she had a daughter, things would really be intolerable!

The point here is "family dynamics," as you so eloquently put it.  Sure, she loves her children and wants them to succeed.  She just lacks tact.  It's taken her a while to back off, but she's getting there.  The mother-daughter relationship is quite unique.  I'm not trained in this but I would say that you honestly agree with your mom about the things she repeatedly goes on about.  I'm not referring to social values or politics, but rather the other stuff.  The most difficult thing to do is take the side in a debate you don't agree with.  I can understand your frustration with all this, Sondra.

As far as self-image, you have very little to concern yourself with.  The pictures you've posted at various ages show a pretty girl and one nicely packaged in her teen and adult years.  I'm happy you posted those two pictures here of your faux hippie-beginning of your stoner phase.  I see I was correct when I said you looked like a kid in reference to the picture you posted of what the sea air did to your hair.  ;)

And in the end I think you're looking forward to getting back into the classroom, huh?
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #155 on: August 31, 2009, 12:15:29 AM »

This isn't my thread, but i just wanted to say I love your posts. You can be so insightful sometimes.
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #156 on: August 31, 2009, 03:44:56 AM »

Well, Mairi, you were part of the discussion.  It's your thread too.  Both of you made comments reminiscent of those I've heard from my sister.  It seems pretty universal. 

Maybe you've both seen Fiddler On The Roof.  Think of the Sabbath Prayer scene where Goldie lights the candles, covers her eyes and recites (sings) the Sabbath prayer.  The scene cuts to other households in the village where mothers are doing the same thing.  In the Jewish faith, mothers are given the duty to bless the family during this ritual.  Tradition has it that angels are flying around her as she does so.  It's considered a most sacred moment.  Her prayer is for her family and is not to include herself.

What I've noticed over the years is that my mom's silent prayer has been getting longer and longer.  And maybe a few more tears now than there were before.  When I see this, any ill feelings I may have vanish instantly.  Maybe this is an additional purpose of this ritual.

 

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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #157 on: August 31, 2009, 04:28:37 AM »

Well, Mairi, you were part of the discussion.  It's your thread too.  Both of you made comments reminiscent of those I've heard from my sister.  It seems pretty universal. 

Maybe you've both seen Fiddler On The Roof.  Think of the Sabbath Prayer scene where Goldie lights the candles, covers her eyes and recites (sings) the Sabbath prayer.  The scene cuts to other households in the village where mothers are doing the same thing.  In the Jewish faith, mothers are given the duty to bless the family during this ritual.  Tradition has it that angels are flying around her as she does so.  It's considered a most sacred moment.  Her prayer is for her family and is not to include herself.

What I've noticed over the years is that my mom's silent prayer has been getting longer and longer.  And maybe a few more tears now than there were before.  When I see this, any ill feelings I may have vanish instantly.  Maybe this is an additional purpose of this ritual.

That's really beautiful. You have the soul of a poet. and I mean that.
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Re: Sondra's Mailbox
« Reply #158 on: September 03, 2009, 05:25:28 AM »

That sounds a lot like Doctor Zhivago.  I'm not as easily distracted, fortunately!  But thanks  :)

I suppose I'm being very sentimental here.  Sometimes I get that way.  But a mother's love and concern for her child begins when she learns she's conceived and ends when her time here has finished.  Yeah, they nag us along the way but they mean well.  And then one day it's the daughter's turn to be a mom and she sees it all from the other side.
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