Heh, my last post was last night. I was so incredibly close to calling or texting her. So then I decided to log on the forums and post what I was feeling in hopes someone could give me advice. Thank god for Apps(thanks a million), Its because of his reply like 5 minutes after my post that convinced to just get over it and just go to sleep(which I did) Then I checked the forums and everyone elses post helped me not to text her in the morning. I'm not sure if anyone remembers, but I lost my job two days after me and her broke up. I found a new job about 6 days after we broke up. So this morning I started training. So I went to the library to make a photo copy of my ID and Social security number for my new job. When I found a parking space in the library and turned off the car, I feel my phone ringing(had it on vibrate). For some reason I knew who it was...I took my phone out of my pocket and looked at the number..and it was her. I was in a bit of shock and it took me a good 5 seconds to do anything(I didn't know whether to pick it up or not). So I got myself back together and decided to pick up.


So we talked pretty briefly...I was in a bit of shock as to why she called me..I mean I was pretty sure she had moved on...I mean..why did she call me? When we talked, she asked how I was and I told her that I had gotten a new job and was going to start training in an hour and a half. She was pretty suprised that I had gotten a job so quick, I guess she was expecting me to be crying over my misfortune of losing her and my old job(That might be too harsh of a guess) I asked her how things were with her. She was telling me that things were not so good with her. I asked her what was the matter and she was hesitant to tell me. I didn't want to push her into telling me so I just Let it be. We  had a nice laugh about something, I can't really remember why because it was happening so fast. I had told her that I was very suprised that she was calling and was totally not expecting it. I had told her that a few times I had come close to contacting her but was afraid that she would turn down an offer a friendship from me because of the way our last phone call went.


I'll start qouting from memory. She said "Yeah I figured that because you told me that you had to dissapear from my life. I was very pissed because the night before you said you would be their for me and then you go and tell me that you didn't want to talk at all." I told her "Well it was an act of emotion. Thats mainly the reason why that happened." I can't really remember what happened after that. All I can remember is that I was starting to run short on time. So I said "I'm sorry but I'm running pretty short on time, and please believe me when I say so." She said "No, I believe". I went on and said "So what happens now?" She said "I don't know..." I said "Well how about I call you? Or if you want..you can call me. You know my name, you know my number(I really said that )" She said "I don't know, this is kind of awkward. I mean, we won't have anything to talk about." I said "Sure we will, don't worry about it" She then said "I don't know whats wrong with me, lately when people have been calling me I haven't been hearing the phone." I said "Well...I don't know..I guess..whatever..I'll leave a message or something" She said "Okay..well..I guess I'll let you go now. I know you're busy at the moment" I said "Okay...well um...Bye." She said "Bye". Then their was an awkward 3 or 4 seconds of silence because we didn't hang up the phone. When we were going out it was always hard to say goodbye and that would happen to us when we got off the phone and we would always finish off with an "I love you". I didn't know whether to tell her I still loved her...I'm pretty sure she was feeling the same. So I just went ahead and hung up. I'm hoping she didn't get mad because I didn't say it.


Well...judging from that call...I got nothing. It was always very tough to see through her games and again she has me stumped as to why she called. I'm in a bit of a rut at what I should do...If I call her..theirs a chance we can be friends again and we could get back together or Calling her will reveal the things shes been doing while I've been moving on..such as maybe getting together with another guy(Now I have no damn clue if she has or not) causing me more pain and basically throwing away all the progress in the last week that I've made from moving on from her. What should I do? She might still care about me and that might be the reason she called...I might have gotten my thoughts wrong. She obviously gave in and called me before I called her(and I probably would have not contacted her at all.). Should I call or not call? This is so tricky..I'm not too sure I'm happy that she called....

eh, dont call with that mindset. if you call, you call as a friend. not as some desperate chump looking to get lucky again and find the short way out. if you do get back together it wont be the same and theres going to be an awkwardness. move on, and if you too continue talking, then keep it as friends, nothing more.

Tricky indeed. You're obviously still in love with this girl. Question is whether she's in love with you as well. You're afraid you might lose her friendship, but friendship is out of question at this moment. It takes time to become friends after you've had a relationship, if it happens at all. Believe me: this girl is more desperate than you are. I know this type of woman: calling you and then saying sorry they've called and looking for mercy or whatever. Still sucking the best out of you: you said 'I got nothing'. That's exactly the thing. She's holding you on a line. Cut it loose. Don't answer her calls and messages for a month (or two) and rebuild yourself. Go training or whatever, go out, meet other people. Close this chapter, at least till you got yourself together again.

I didn't get past the first paragraph Wordno...started so good and then I felt the negatives.....Do nothing and she'll phone you some more (we all knew it)....you just gotta work on not answering....She's lost her chance of your greatness. Take it as an encouraging sign of moving on.

Good luck with the new job and your new lack of negative life!!!!!!

you know, after listening to wordno's thing, i realized that i almost had the same situation as that, same type of girlfriend. but i think mine actually got the point when i basically flipped out and explained to her that she treats her exs like mess then expects to get back with them in a week.

...i have a wonderful way with the womenfolk dont i

Wordno, sorry to butt into your private affairs, but reading this from a pretty objective place, I'd say she's suffering from "separation anxiety" or some other such bullshit and is merely using you as a crutch before/as she moves on.  

It's like getting a job.  Easier to get one when you have one.  Same with a girl/guy, even if you're not still officially dating, it provides that comfort zone and self-confidence that the other person apparently needs to move on.  You'll end up really disliking her if you continue to let yourself play this role for her.  

Just a thought.  Well meant.  And something I understand firsthand.  

How are things going with all these broken hearts?

mines healed with drinking and one night stands. but in the words of U2, i still haven't found what i'm looking for

I'm saying nothing. It's just that if I'm alive I'll maybe bump into her one day.

Relationships are like jobs--You meet/interview as it were, decide you are the perfect candidate for the position, they are the perfect company, and you both enter into a mutual agreement that it's a great match.  And then, about 8-10 months later, you realize how fucked up it is.

Quoted from juniorsfarm

Relationships are like jobs--You meet/interview as it were, decide you are the perfect candidate for the position, they are the perfect company, and you both enter into a mutual agreement that it's a great match.  And then, about 8-10 months later, you realize how fucked up it is.

Don't tell Mairi.  

Circles.

Quoted from Bobber

Don't tell Mairi.  

Ffft, I say, and fffft once more.

ffft to your fffft, mairi

This is the exocism post.