Quoted from mr kite

ALBERT SAYS : ice rink , my young lady , when you have slayed dragons travelled half the world looking for shiney cups , an ice rink attendendent in manchester do`snt have the same appeal

MR kite . no sorry i dont like him TANGERINE ,
WOULDNT YOU LIKE TO KNOW ABOUT HIS QUEST [ hint hint nudge nudge ]

Ok I respect your dislike of the new Doctor Who then (however don't say I didn't warn you that you are missing out on a fantastic series!)

Ok ALBERT, I would love to know about your Quest! (can you please translate and ask him)  

ALBERT SAYS :  soup , and for dinner , soup , tea soup , hes remembers the time when this bloke called DAN BROWN [ da`vinci code bloke ] asked him about the grail and wrote the book on the tales of MY QUEST
Mr kite  wheres my pie in the sky?

Bye all, there are 2 tacos calling me

Here, give ALBERT this tomato soup- from me



Does he like tomato?

Wow Dan Brown ay? Impressive past life he had!

Well , ALBERT said he went round for dinner at the fisher kings house , where they had fish , and he noticed the cup all shiney and that , and asked the fisher king about it and you want to know what he said ?

Tomato HIS FAV. he said

Yes! What did he say????

ALBERT : IVE FORGOTTEN IT WAS SUCH I LONG TIME AGO

hahaha! Tell him that is NO excuse and he should attempt to jog his memory by acting out the parts he CAN remember of it!

mr kite ; IVE GIVE HIM SOME TOMATO SOUP AND STALE BREAD , hes ready to talk now

STALE bread?!  

Good to hear you are looking after him! It's hard to know exactly what to say to such a long-lived legend as good ole ALBERT!

Where oh where did Pie go?! Edit: oh to get tacos! I didn't read that! Enjoy, pie

ALBERT ; well it was given him by this lady who said she was jesus `s misses and could i look after it , because she was going on holiday to scotland [ wheres theres no decent dr whos ] and never came back , so he made a brew in it and the leg he had lost in the crusades grew back !

MR KITE : Do YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED NEXT ?

YES what happened next, ALBERT???

(pah just rub salt into a wound why don't you with your mentioning of no good Scottish Doctor Who s! I warn you I am part scottish. I may come running after you with a Haggis. a huge Kilt and a radio on my shoulder blasting out the Proclaimers!)

mr kite , i thought there was a connection , im a quarter irish , and i love blackpuddings and stone roses  

ALBERT ; Shut up mr kite im telling a story ,
MR kite ; sorry
ALBERT ; any way we was looking at his drawings of castles and moats , and there was a blinding light and this bloke turns up with a white beard and says hes god ?
"IM reclaiming the grail and you will tell ARTHUR king of the britions he must seek the grail when he becomes king ,  that he must search for it ,and that" ,he said, and god disappeared

MR KITE ; BLIMEY  

ALBERT, you are rather fascinating and I have very much enjoyed you being here! I must leave now

Thanks for another great show Mr Kite- I liked the addition of the guest  Has been a long show too! Good stuff Many happy returns (hah what does that expression even mean) But yes, all the best, take care!

albert; good night TANGERINE  

MR kite; goodnight TANGERINE  

tonights show is dedicated to ROBERT RANKIN  A GENIUS AND A MAD ENGLISH MAN