Well, that's an opinion, and one I don't happen to share. Many maritime historians don't—fellow "deplorable" Dan Butler being one of them.
Kathy, I'll certainly defer to the maritime historians and to you out of respect for your many years of reading and research of the Titanic disaster. The extent of my knowledge of the event is having read A Night To Remember and watching three motion pictures; A Night To Remember, Titanic (1953), and now this Titanic fanedit.
Perhaps "vilified" is too strong a term to be casually used in reference to Ismay. If he was indeed running around shouting "women and children first," as he was portrayed in the novel and films, then he should at least be criticized for not leading a woman to the lifeboat and seating her. Certainly there were many women, and children, standing on deck at the moment he decided to get into the lifeboat. I've read that there were several instances of noble behavior on the part of male passengers.
I mentioned that there were others. both aboard and not aboard the Titanic, responsible, in part, for the disaster. Specifically they are Captain Smith, Thomas Andrews, the White Star Line, and the crew of the Californian.
This leads to a view I have regarding the scarcity of of noble behavior in contemporary times. But this would be a topic of further discussion in another thread.